I had this post on my mind for a while now. Just finding the right time to spell out my feelings in a way that wouldn't come across as whiny, was tough. But today when I found it hard to drag my little butt out of bed and when husband brought me breakfast, then refused to bring me lunch to the bedroom too, I figured I had a little bit of a problem on my hands; I may be suffering from a mild case of the blogging blues.
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Everyone has their own reasons for blogging and for some, there's more than one main reason. Yet, it can be tough to maintain a sense of purpose and a sense of acceptance from your blogging peers when it seems like everyone and their Mom (seriously, I mean this in the most literal ways possible) has started a blog. Blogging is the new facebook. An accessory to some, a way for others to claim their chunk of Internet real estate. Sometimes blogging feels like I'm swimming in an overcrowded pool of bloggers; I'm not drowning but instead grazing other's legs as they too try to tread and maintain their position on the surface. Then all of a sudden, 50 new swimmers cannon ball into the pool. And you know what happens next. Blogging can feel like a fight to the surface, like you need to kick a little harder to avoid getting trampled by the new swimmers.
Remember in high school when you'd get dressed in the morning in your brand new jeans and top, heading off to school feeling like a million bucks? Only to get there and see that that much prettier, smarter and more poplar friend of yours was sporting an even better new outfit, leaving you in turn feeling defeated, left out, maybe even reconsidering why you even bought your new digs in the first place. I feel like this with blogging sometimes. When I look at my blog, and my blog only, I feel a great sense of accomplishment. For more than two years I've groomed this little babe into something that's become my full time job, my purpose and my calling. But then I look around at the gazillion others, who in much less time have more followers, more pictures of themselves and their girlfriends, better submissions, prettier posts, more happiness it seems (all while they make it look so effortless) and I think, what could I have done differently?
The answer is, I think nothing. This whole comparison game is all too familiar (remember the comparison game I played here?) And in short, comparison is the road to madness. Apb gets on my case daily about my little pity parties because they probably drive him nutty. Actually they do drive him nutty because I know how they make me feel. Close friends (you know who you are and I adore you) continually sing praises to me in an effort to either shut me up or allow me to realize I am fabulous the way I am (or perhaps both). And me? Well, these bouts of the blogging blues are a sign that I care. That I really truly care about this blog, what's its been, where it's going and what it represents to me and the thousands of you that read it everyday regardless of how boring you may find me or the content here. That if I didn't feel the need to be better, to grow, to learn, to stay inspired and on top of myself personally and professional then these blogging blues wouldn't exist; and I am a firm believer in going through a little bit of bad to feel a whole lot of good.
Jenna McKenzie took these fun little shots of me. I asked her to capture the real me. I think she did just that xo
Anyone else out there ever feel the Blogging Blues?